I did know one thing and that was that I didn’t feel that love for him – the kind that my gal-pals were expressing for their boyfriends. I loved that we could talk about anything and that he made me feel safe. I loved receiving and sending him letters. I loved encouraging him and being there for him while he served our country. I thought it was noble of him. After a few years of dating and meeting his family, I realized I was in love with the idea of love, but not with him.
As I heard the door lock one tear fell from my eye. My grandma walked over to me and said, “Now, your Mom is sad that you did say goodbye.” I ran to the door and I caught her before she left the porch and screamed, “I love you mommy and I’m still mad!” She turned and smiled as she blew me a kiss and mouthed, I love you too.
While in college, I spent Thanksgiving with my sister Debora and her new son, Sean. I remember talking on the phone with my mom the entire time while I tried to recreate her stuffing. Thanksgiving just wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without it. I was crushed when I realized I didn’t have Sage and there was no store open.