Hey Stars,
I want you to imagine something.
Imagine you have a secret. It’s not a “scary” secret, but it’s a heavy one. For seven years—that’s 2,555 days—I sat right here. I wrote the blog posts you read. I shared the recipes. I sent the emails. From your side of the screen, Lavanda Michelle was “fine.” I was still your Midwest girl, still glowing, still talking about the sparkles.
But there was a catch.
Every time I looked at that little red “Record” button on my camera? My heart would hit my ribs like a trapped bird. My breath would catch. I would look at the lens—that unblinking glass eye—and all I could see was what I was trying to hide.
I was a professional blogger who was terrified of being seen.
You see, a lot can happen in seven years. While I was typing away, my “Ferrari engine” was redlining. I was 249.6 pounds, struggling to catch my breath, and using my words to build a wall between me and the world. It’s one thing to tell a story with a keyboard; it’s an entirely different thing to stand in the light and let you see the struggle in my eyes.
I didn’t “disappear” from the internet… I disappeared from the frame.
I was hiding in plain sight. I was too smart to keep pretending, yet too scared to stop. I told myself I was “just a writer now,” but that was a lie I told to protect my ego. The truth? I was a Ferrari rusting in a dark garage because I didn’t want anyone to see the dents.
But then, something shifted in the silence of these North Carolina woods.
I realized that if I want to help you—my Stars—live your brightest lives, I can’t do it from the shadows. I can’t just give you the “fresh paint” version of my life anymore. You deserve the foundation. You deserve the raw, unpolished, “Chapter Two” truth.
So, I did the one thing that felt impossible. I reached out, I wiped the dust off the lens, and I pressed Record.
I’m finally stepping back into the light. I’m not just a voice in your inbox anymore. I’m right here.
The ghost is gone. Lavanda is back.
What are your thoughts about I Disappeared for 7 Years. Here is the Truth. Please share in the comments below. I really would love to know.
Until next time, shine amongst the stars!
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2,555 days of hiding behind a keyboard. ⌨️ For 7 years, I was a ghost on YouTube, even while blogging every day. The mystery is over. I finally pressed record. 🎥✨ #LavandaMichelle #YouTubeReturn #ChapterTwo #Stars✨ ❤️ #LavandaMIchelle
“The ghost is gone. Lavanda is back.” Best line I’ve read all year. I’m subscribing for the growth and the honesty, not the perfection.
Marcus, thank you! I’m so glad that line landed. Growth and honesty over perfection every time—grateful you’re here for the journey.
I’ve lived long enough to know that the “sparkles” always fade, but the truth remains. It’s never too late to start a Chapter Two, even if you’ve been “redlining” for years. You have a graceful spirit, Lavanda, and I’m glad you’re back. I’ll be watching your videos from my porch.
Arthur, thank you. You’re so right—the sparkles fade, but truth lasts. I’m grateful for your kind words and that you’ll be watching from your porch… it feels like the perfect welcome back.
I never realized that while I was reading your recipes and tips, you were fighting for your own breath. This level of honesty is exactly why I’ve stayed a ‘Star’ all these years.
This means so much to me. Thank you for staying all these years… truly. I was fighting quietly, but knowing you’ve been here as a “Star” reminds me none of it was for nothing. I’m so grateful for you.
The ‘ghost’ is gone, but the spirit you’ve brought back is so much stronger. Welcome back to the light, Levanda Michelle. We missed the woman behind the words.
This gave me chills. Thank you for welcoming me back so warmly. I’m still finding my footing, but I’m grateful to be here… fully, honestly, and no longer hiding.