Things I Wish I Knew Before I Got Married

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Marriage is often painted as a fairy tale—two people falling in love, having the perfect wedding, and living happily ever after. But as magical as it sounds, marriage is so much more than that. It’s a lifelong commitment filled with highs and lows, learning experiences, and growth. Looking back, there are a few things I wish I had known before I said, “I do.” So, for anyone about to get married or thinking about it, here’s some advice from someone who’s been through it!

1. Love Isn’t Always Enough

Before getting married, I thought that as long as we loved each other, everything else would just fall into place. But I quickly learned that love, while important, isn’t always enough to make a marriage work. A strong marriage also requires patience, understanding, compromise, and communication. You’ll need to work through tough moments, talk about things that make you uncomfortable, and sometimes make sacrifices for the sake of your relationship.

2. Communication Is Everything

I used to think that communication was just about talking things out when there was a problem. But communication in marriage is so much more than that—it’s about listening, expressing your needs, and being open even when it’s hard. Sometimes, you’ll need to have those awkward or tough conversations, whether it’s about finances, future plans, or boundaries. The more you communicate with each other, the better your marriage will be.

3. You’re Marrying Their Family, Too

Here’s something I didn’t fully realize until after I got married: when you marry someone, you’re also marrying their family. Their family dynamics, traditions, and even drama become part of your life. Learning to navigate relationships with in-laws can be tricky at times, but it’s something that you and your spouse will need to handle together. The key is setting healthy boundaries early on and being supportive of each other’s family ties.

4. It’s Okay to Have Bad Days

In movies, marriage looks like endless date nights, flowers, and romantic gestures. In reality, there will be bad days, and that’s perfectly normal. You won’t always feel like you’re on the same page, and sometimes life will throw challenges your way that test your relationship. The important thing is to not let those bad days define your marriage. It’s okay to argue and have off days, as long as you come back together, work through it, and continue building your relationship.

5. Money Matters More Than You Think

Before getting married, I didn’t think too much about how money would affect our relationship. But finances can be one of the biggest sources of stress in a marriage. Whether it’s budgeting, saving, or dealing with debt, being on the same page about money is crucial. I wish I had spent more time discussing finances with my spouse before we tied the knot. It’s important to be open about spending habits, financial goals, and how you’ll manage money as a team.

6. Personal Space Is Important

I used to believe that marriage meant spending all your time together. But the truth is, having time apart is just as important as spending time together. Personal space allows you to recharge, pursue your own interests, and maintain a sense of individuality. It’s okay to have separate hobbies or take time for yourself—doing so can actually strengthen your relationship and prevent burnout.

7. You Will Change, and So Will They

Marriage is a journey, and both you and your spouse will grow and change over time. Your interests, priorities, and even personalities may evolve, and that’s okay. What’s important is being able to grow together and support each other through those changes. Don’t expect your spouse to be the exact same person they were on your wedding day—and don’t feel like you have to stay the same either. Embrace the changes as part of your shared journey.

8. It’s Not 50/50 Every Day

Before getting married, I thought that everything in marriage would be split evenly—50/50 in responsibilities, effort, and compromise. But some days, one person will need to carry more of the load. Life happens, and there will be times when one of you is dealing with stress, illness, or exhaustion. Marriage is about being flexible and stepping up for each other when needed, without keeping score. Some days it’s 60/40, or even 80/20, and that’s perfectly fine.

9. You’re Still You—Marriage Doesn’t Mean Losing Yourself

One of the things I wish I knew is that marriage doesn’t mean losing your identity. It’s easy to get caught up in being a “we,” but it’s just as important to stay connected to who you are as an individual. Keep nurturing your passions, friendships, and personal goals. A strong marriage is made up of two whole people who support each other, not two people who lose themselves in the relationship.

10. Laughter Is a Game-Changer

Life can get stressful, and marriage can sometimes feel like hard work. But one thing that will always help? Laughter. Being able to laugh together, even during tough times, keeps things light and helps you reconnect. Don’t take yourselves too seriously, and remember to have fun. A shared sense of humor can be one of the best tools for keeping your relationship strong and joyful.

Conclusion

Marriage is a beautiful, rewarding journey, but it’s also full of lessons you only learn along the way. While love is a powerful foundation, it takes communication, patience, compromise, and a whole lot of understanding to make a marriage work. Looking back, these are the things I wish I had known before getting married, and hopefully, they’ll help you on your own journey. Remember, every marriage is unique, but with love and effort, you can build a lasting partnership that grows stronger over time.

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Until next time, shine amongst the stars!

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“Marriage is more than a fairytale! 🏰💍 From communication to personal space, here are 10 things I wish I knew before saying ‘I do.’ 💕 Ready to strengthen your relationship? Read my latest insights! #MarriageAdvice #Relationships”