Hey friends, Lavanda Michelle here. I’ve been navigating a whirlwind of emotions as my middle daughter, Zoey, is contemplating moving out of the dorms and into her very own apartment next semester. On one hand, I am beyond proud of how independent she’s becoming. On the other hand? Let’s just say I’m terrified.
From Dorm Life to Apartment Living: A Big Step
For those of you who don’t know, Zoey is attending college about three hours away from home, and she’s spent the last few years living in the dorms. I’ve always felt a certain sense of comfort knowing she was just a short walk or call away. Dorm life provides a built-in safety net. Everything she needs is on campus: food, medical care, resources, and most importantly, she has a community that’s close by. I met her RA, and I felt so much better knowing that someone was looking out for her.
But now… she’s talking about moving off-campus. Into an apartment. My stomach does a little flip every time I think about it.
The Fear of the Unknown
As a mom who watches too many true crime documentaries (I admit it, I’m that mom), the thought of her living on her own is terrifying. What if something happens? What if she’s in a dangerous situation? I know, I know—safety is a concern for any parent, but with Zoey living off-campus, the worries feel a little closer to home. The idea of her being away from the immediate support of the dorms brings up all kinds of “what-ifs” that I can’t help but imagine.
There’s no resident advisor to knock on her door or campus police patrolling right outside. She’s going to have to navigate things on her own, and honestly, that’s a lot for a mom to stomach. I’m still trying to wrap my mind around the shift, but I know it’s part of her growing up.
Supporting Her Independence
Even though I’m scared, I want Zoey to be independent. She’s always been someone who wants to take control of her life, and moving into an apartment is a big step in that direction. She’s ready to manage her own space, deal with utilities, rent, and all the adulting that comes with it. I couldn’t be prouder of her for wanting to take this leap.
But as her mom, I feel like it’s my job to make sure she’s prepared for the challenges she’ll face. I’m trying my best to shift from “hovering mom” to “supportive mom,” even though my heart might still be clinging to the dorm life a little bit. I mean, the dorms feel safe. I know they’re safe. But apartment living? It’s a different world.
Safety Comes First
The most important thing right now is ensuring that Zoey understands the importance of safety in her new living situation. I want her to be aware of her surroundings, to trust her instincts, and to always be mindful of things like locking doors, not answering the door to strangers, and knowing her neighbors. It’s a whole new level of responsibility, and as a mom, I feel like I need to equip her with as much knowledge as possible.
We’ve had some tough conversations about safety—everything from keeping windows locked to knowing who to call if she feels uncomfortable. I want her to take self-defense classes and have a solid plan for emergencies. We’ve discussed having a trusted group of friends who can look out for each other, too.
I know she’s smart, capable, and independent, but as a mom, these are the things that keep me awake at night. Zoey’s safety and well-being are my top priority, and I will do everything in my power to make sure she feels confident and secure as she takes this next step.
Adjusting to Change
Zoey’s move is a big change for both of us. I’m going to miss her like crazy. She’s only three hours away, but with a busy schedule, I know we won’t be able to see each other as often. That’s a hard pill to swallow. I’ve spent so many years helping her navigate her life, and now I’m taking a step back, letting her spread her wings.
But that’s what this is all about, right? Watching your children grow, become independent, and chase their own dreams—even when it scares you to death. I’m proud of her, and I’ll continue to support her every step of the way, even if it means letting go a little bit.
What are your thoughts about the From Dorms to Apartments: Navigating My Middle Daughter Zoey’s Move Off-Campus. Please share in the comments below. I really would love to know.
Until next time, shine amongst the stars!
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Zoey’s taking a huge step—moving out of the dorms and into an apartment next semester. I’m terrified but proud, and making sure she’s safe is my top priority. 💕 #ProudMom #SafetyFirst #CollegeLife
This is something that I haven’t experiences with my boys since they both are in college, My oldest moved in with his friend, and my youngest is still at home.