As the nurse wheeled her next to me and helped me raise my bed, she asked if I wanted to hold her. Before she could complete that sentence I had my arms stretched out for my baby. I pulled her next to me and gave her a gentle hug and kissed her head covered by a pink cap. I laid her on the bed and unwrapped her blanket so I could pull her cap off. I said to her, “You have all your toes, and fingers and a head full of curly hair.”
As I sang, tears fell from my eyes because Tim was not there with me. My brother had gone and Zoey looked so much like him and he was also my sunshine. Then the phone rang to my room and it was Tim. His first words to me were, “I love you.” My voice cracked as I uttered, “Then why aren’t you here?” Although I knew the answer, my heart was broken. I couldn’t believe I said those words because my heart screamed, I miss you and I love you too. But my mouth betrayed me and expressed words that I didn’t mean to say.